Christian Schneider

Author, Columnist

I Rule the Road

I\’m not usually one to blow my own horn (which I don\’t think is legal in Wisconsin anymore), but I do have to admit – I am the greatest snow driver of all time.  I consider those of you who stay home because a little snow falls to be weak of spirit and onion-deficient.  My 4-wheel drive and I are like Batman and Robin.  Peanut Butter and Jelly.  Gin and Tonic.  Hall and Oates.  You get the picture.

In fact, my drive to work today was reminiscent of the opening scene of \”Undercover Brother,\” in which he spins out for 30 seconds while failing to spill a drip of his Big Gulp:

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Enjoy your hot cocoa at home – I\’ll be here at work defending freedom.  And shopping on eBay.


  1. Sorry, but you can’t claim that title until you demonstrate that you can drive up my parent’s driveway in a snowstorm. And because I am the only one on earth to do it without hitting anything, you will have to be content with “second greatest snow driver of all time.”

  2. Nice. I prefer the Bluesmobile parallel park job though.

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