My Here and Now bit on college hijinks brought up some pretty funny memories of the old days. Specifically, there was a time when I got a great deal on a new girlfriend:
At the house where I lived, there were these two giant columns in front. From my bedroom, you could climb out the window and actually slide down one of the columns for fun. In fact, this took place fairly often after we had a few drinks.
One time, when I was out of town, this cute girl climbed out my window, started to slide down the column, and let go. She fell about 15 feet and smacked the side of her head on the concrete. They rushed her to the hospital, and thankfully she lived, although she lost all hearing in her left ear.
For me, this was fantastic news – the chance to land a cute girl at a discount. This was finally the break I was looking for. It would be like finding a great pair of jeans marked \”irregular\” at the outlet mall – or being able to buy a Lexus with three wheels at 80% off. She had everything, except of course the ability to hear out of one ear.
So we went out a few times, but our boyfriend/girlfriend negotiations stalled. Soon, she left for school out of town, and it was over. I tried to convince her to stay, but she wouldn\’t listen.
I don\’t know if there\’s really a life lesson or anything here, except maybe this – maybe it\’s time we break the taboo of picking girls up in the emergency room.