Christian Schneider

Author, Columnist

Author: Christian (page 25 of 81)

That\’s Debatable

Tonight, the presidential candidates went toe-to-toe for the final time.  I thought McCain did better than his previous debates, but still didn\’t set the world on fire.  Whatever.  I\’ve always thought that at the end of debates, the moderator should actually declare a winner, who would then get to hold a giant championship belt over their head while the loser trash talked them, pro-wrestling style.

What is really important is that I actually found myself watching the debate on CNN, with the little squiggly lines at the bottom of the screen tracking what some \”independent\” voters were thinking at the time.  And I was actually yelling out loud at the lines as they tracked across the screen.  For instance, I noticed that McCain didn\’t get much of a bump from women voters when he was talking about school choice.  \”JESUS CHRIST, WOMEN!\” I could be heard to exclaim.

It\’s also important to figure out whether there\’s a time delay in the graph lines.  Like, McCain would make a good point, and I\’d sit and wait to see if there\’s a lag… and there would be no bump… and I\’d get mad.  You know half the guys are sitting in this room trying to get some action from the \”undecided\” woman next to them, so they move the dial whenever she does, just to go with the flow.  Meanwhile, I\’m at home violently shifting to one side or the other just trying to coax the line up a little bit with some body language.

Also, what\’s up with McCain scribbling furiously whenever Obama starts talking?  What is he writing?  I fully expected him to hold up his notepad at the end of the debate to reveal a sketch of Sarah Palin riding a dolphin or something.

One final important note – even when Obama is clean shaven, he still has the faint hint of a mustache going.  If he gets elected, he just needs to let nature take its course and free the \’stache.  Now THAT would be a change I can believe in.

How to Steal Votes in Wisconsin

With all the talk about the criminal charges against groups like ACORN for trying to fatten Wisconsin’s voter rolls, I thought it would be helpful to stroll through the state’s statutes to give a common language explanation of what exactly it is that they’re doing wrong, and why it matters.  The easiest way to do so, I think, is to compile a simple how-to manual describing the various ways state law allows you to cast a fraudulent vote and never be caught.

Of course, the overriding theme here is names – once someone gets a false name on a voter list, it is there virtually for good.  A first name, last name and address is as good as a vote, as long as identification isn’t necessary to verify it at the polls.  If ACORN were merely adding fraudulent names to voter rolls to satisfy some kind of quota they had set for themselves, that would still be fraud, but not nearly as concerning.  But since Wisconsin doesn’t require any sort of identification verification at the polls, those names could quickly become votes – which can easily sway elections.

#1:  “Deputize”

This is the one you’ve been hearing about in the news recently.  Until the last year or so, local governments could “deputize” people to go out and collect names to be added to the voter rolls.  The names were written down on cards and mailed in.  In theory, these are supposed to be treated like mail-in registrations, which require some form of proof of residence.  But this required local governments to be vigilant in doing the legwork to verify all these new names, which may not have often occurred.

Now, the state is supposed to be handling the “deputy” registration process.  ACORN submits the names they collect to the state, which does a preliminary check, then farms the names out to the municipality to do the final check.  But what ACORN tries to do is flood the state with names, so it takes a long time for them to sort through them and redirect them to the local clerk.  Some clerks have said they are still getting registrations from the state dated as far back as August – and with just a few days left before the election, there’s just not enough time to do the requisite checks.  As a result, a lot of names could be showing up on the rolls without adequate verification.

After the election, clerks are required to send post cards to all the new registrants to verify addresses.  If a post card comes back undeliverable and the individual voted, those names are supposed to be forwarded to the district attorney in that municipality’s county.  Once the DA has those names, it is completely up to them what they do with them.  And given the time needed to track down these people, those names could sit on the shelf for a while.

But, as noted, once a vote is cast, it is cast.  As long as ACORN has a Xerox machine and copies off the cards, they know the names they put on the voter lists.  And any one of their volunteers can go from polling place to polling place, voting under any number of pseudonyms.

#2:  “The Vouch”

When someone actually registers to vote for the first time at the polls, some form of proof of residence is required.  This could be a driver’s license, bank statement, utility bill, or several other forms of identification.  If a person does not have the required identification, they can still cast a provisional ballot.  It is only after a person is registered that they are no longer forced to verify their identity.  However, there is a giant loophole – someone can register to vote without any form of identification as long as a registered voter “vouches” for them.

So on election day, you will sometimes see a situation where a bus of people pulls up, with none of the people having identification.  One person on the bus will be a registered voter in the municipality, and will then “vouch” for all the others, which will then be allowed to register on the spot without any form of ID.  These people could be from Illinois, they could be from Texas, they could be from Prague.  And the only way their residence can every be verified is months after the election, when the postcard check is completed, if it is ever completed.

#3:  “Phone a Friend”

Under state law, voter lists are public information, and for good reason.  The public should have a right to examine who is registered.  As such, sometimes you will see poll watchers at the polls, who have a copy of the same list the clerks have.  When a voter comes in and casts a ballot, the poll watcher scratches that name off the master list.

Near the end of the day, the poll worker is left with a list of all the people who haven’t voted – which, even during the busiest days, is half the list.  At around 7:00 PM, they can get on the phone and read off a list of names of people who have not yet voted, so people can come down and use those names to cast ballots.  Again, since no identification is required, there’s no way the poll workers can question whether they are the actual people they say they are.

This method has the added bonus of filling up the polling place right before they’re scheduled to close at 8:00, which leads to lawsuits being filed to keep the polling place open.  That way, if the wrong candidate wins, voter suppression can be alleged.

Of course in two of the above ways, it is impossible to go back and check whether fraud has occurred, since voting under a name on the rolls is perfectly legal without identification.  And, to the state’s credit, other openings for potential fraud have been tightened up in recent years.  Checks are being done to make sure voters aren’t registered at more than one location within the state.  At one time, a community group could request a stack of ballots, have people fill them out in their offices, and send them in absentee (this is what happened at the famous “bingo” party Governor Doyle’s volunteers held in Kenosha in 2002.)  Apparently, that no longer is legal.  It should also be noted that some of ACORN’s volunteers are being caught, which means some safeguards are working.

However, despite many of these safeguards being in place now, the toothpaste may already be out of the tube.  Who knows how many false names and addresses have been added to the voter rolls by these community groups in the past few years.  And, as noted, they are extremely difficult to check.  And new regulations do nothing to roll back the names that already exist.  ACORN knows these names, but clerks do not.

Also, there are still tactics that go on that can’t be easily fixed by state law.  Offering “smokes for votes” to homeless people is going to go on – it’s illegal, but difficult to catch.  College students are probably still going to be able to vote in their home states and in Wisconsin, until there’s a national database check – which, given Wisconsin’s difficulty in putting together a statewide list, is still a long way away.  Campaigns will still be able to shell out under the table “walking money” to volunteers to pay them to get people to the polls.

But with a simple switch to a photo ID requirement, all of ACORN’s shenanigans are undercut significantly.  It severs the tie between “vote fraud” and “vote registration fraud,” and gives our electors more insurance that their votes aren’t being cancelled out by fraud.

Red Apple\’s Core Constituency

This week, my daughter has been picked as \”Kid of the Week\” at her preschool, which confers on her the right to choose her class\’ activities for the next few days.  My wife and I thought it would be fun to set up a mini-polling booth for the class, where they could cast ballots for their favorite apple – red or yellow.  Never too early to learn a little civic duty.  We (\”we\” = \”my wife\”) built a little ballot box, and let our daughter design and color the ballots.

When it came time to vote, I was surprised that yellow apple actually won.  Who likes yellow apples?  Then, it occurred to me that ACORN bused in a bunch of kids from a day care in Illinois to stuff the ballot box.  Just a week ago, the polls had red apple up six points – but then yellow apple began running TV ads linking him to William Pears.

(Pause for groan.)

Oddly – and this actually happened – when the kids who voted for yellow apple found out they had won, they began taunting the red apple kids.  So the teacher told me she rigged some system by which both apples won.  Now, I can understand how unpleasant it must be to have to spend the remainder of the afternoon with a bunch of surly kids who feel like losers, but this is actually the most important lesson of democracy.  Candidates win and candidates lose – you have to get over it and move on.  Otherwise, you get bitter and do loony things like trying to im-peach the apple.  (Get it?  Im-peach?  No?)

When reached for comment, yellow apple vowed that in the next election, he\’s going to exploit red apple\’s position on apple stem cell research.

Everyone Out of the Presidential Pool

One of the understated joys of sifting through state statutes is finding little, arcane laws that are on the books for some reason, but are never enforced. In a lot of cases, you wonder how they got there in the first place – there must have been a great back story.

In any event, head on over to Chapter 6 of the Wisconsin Statutes, which governs which citizens are eligible to vote. Behold Wis. Stat. 6.03(2):

(2) No person shall be allowed to vote in any election in which the person has made or become interested, directly or indirectly, in any bet or wager depending upon the result of the election.

As it turns out, I myself am involved in a friendly wager based on the outcome of the election. I guess that means I can\’t vote. And anyone that takes part in any kind of \”guess the percantage pool?\” You\’re out, too. Apparently, if you have a financial stake in the outcome of an election, you\’re allowed to moderate a presidential debate, but not vote.

For me, this actually turns out to be good news: as of right now, my bet ain\’t lookin\’ so hot. So I can just pull out of it for fear the cops are going to haul me out of the voting booth and billy club me for trying to win my bet.

As a friend of mine noted, I should probably fear Wis. Stat 6.03(3) even more: Being declared mentally incompetent.

In all seriousness, this statute seems a little naive. Virtually everyone involved in a campaign is essentially placing a bet on the outcome of the election. One of the primary reasons candidates are able to draw people out to volunteer is the promise of a job or some other perk if they win. If a campaign contribution isn\’t essentially placing a bet on the outcome of the election, what is?

And for those actually interested in betting on the election, here are the Vegas lines as of this morning:

John McCain 3-1

Barack Obama 1-5

In layman\’s terms, Obama is an enormous favorite. If you bet $100 on McCain, you stand to make $300 if he wins. But if you want to make money betting on Obama, you have to lay $500 just to win $100. Just make sure you don\’t vote, as it would be illegal.

UPDATE: As I clicked \”publish\” on this post, I immediately went to Wispolitics\’ website, which is advertising a free subscription if you win their \”election picking\” contest. Hope that prize also comes with bail money.

Everyone Out of the Presidential Pool

One of the understated joys of sifting through state statutes is finding little, arcane laws that are on the books for some reason, but are never enforced.  In a lot of cases, you wonder how they got there in the first place – there must have been a great back story.

In any event, head on over to Chapter 6 of the Wisconsin Statutes, which governs which citizens are eligible to vote.  Behold Wis. Stat. 6.03(2):

(2) No person shall be allowed to vote in any election in which the person has made or become interested, directly or indirectly, in any bet or wager depending upon the result of the election.

As it turns out, I myself am involved in a friendly wager based on the outcome of the election.  I guess that means I can’t vote.  And anyone that takes part in any kind of “guess the percantage pool?”  You’re out, too.  Apparently, if you have a financial stake in the outcome of an election, you’re allowed to moderate a presidential debate, but not vote.

For me, this actually turns out to be good news:  as of right now, my bet ain’t lookin’ so hot.  So I can just pull out of it for fear the cops are going to haul me out of the voting booth and billy club me for trying to win my bet.

As a friend of mine noted, I should probably fear Wis. Stat 6.03(3) even more:  Being declared mentally incompetent.

In all seriousness, this statute seems a little naive.  Virtually everyone involved in a campaign is essentially placing a bet on the outcome of the election.  One of the primary reasons candidates are able to draw people out to volunteer is the promise of a job or some other perk if they win.  If a campaign contribution isn’t essentially placing a bet on the outcome of the election, what is?

And for those actually interested in betting on the election, here are the Vegas lines as of this morning:

John McCain 3-1

Barack Obama 1-5

In layman’s terms, Obama is an enormous favorite.  If you bet $100 on McCain, you stand to make $300 if he wins.  But if you want to make money betting on Obama, you have to lay $500 just to win $100.  Just make sure you don’t vote, as it would be illegal.

UPDATE: As I clicked “publish” on this post, I immediately went to Wispolitics’ website, which is advertising a free subscription if you win their “election picking” contest. Hope that prize also comes with bail money.

Hansen Seeing a Rise in the Poll

For years, Wisconsin’s 30th State Senate district (around the Green Bay area) has been a swing district.  Held by Republican State Senator Gary Drzwiecki until 2000, it has now been won twice by Democrat Dave Hansen.  At one point this year, Republicans had some hope of perhaps taking the seat back, but that optimism seems to be fading fast.  In all likelihood, Hansen will win a third term comfortably.

All that being said, Hansen has managed to inject his race with a little sizzle.  Last month, Hansen issued a lit piece to the district meant to address gas prices.  On the piece, Hansen’s staff used a photo of an electric car which they likely swiped from the internet.  When crediting the source of the photo, the piece lists “FreeFotos.com.”  Only one problem:  Freefotos.com is a pornographic website.  (I’m not even going to provide a link to it here – if you’re really dying to see it, you know how to find it.)

Here’s the piece (click to enlarge):

Note the Hansen campaign slogan:

“Hard working.  For hard working people.”  I bet.

Of course, this is all meaningless in the scope of the campaign, yet still entertaining.

Identifying James T.

I got back from being on the road for four days on Sunday, and began combing through the week’s news to see what I had missed. Naturally, the big story in Wisconsin was Milwaukee talk show host and blogger James T. Harris’ admonition to John McCain to “take it to” Barack Obama – which made national news.

Now, I recognize that this story has pretty much run its course, as it is five days old now. Stories in campaign season have the shelf life of mayonnaise in the sun – I might as well be writing about how the Bee Gees are bringing back the urban beard. But there is one aspect of this story that remains interesting to me.

As I scanned the web, I noticed this account of Harris’ confrontation with McCain as reported by the Washington Post:

“It is absolutely vital that you take it to Obama, that you hit him where it hits, there’s a soft spot,” said James T. Harris, a local radio talk show host, who urged the Republican nominee to use Barack Obama’s controversial former pastor, the Rev. Jeremiah A. Wright Jr., and others against him.

“We have the good Reverend Wright. We have [the Rev. Michael L.] Pfleger. We have all of these shady characters that have surrounded him,” Harris bellowed. “We have corruption here in Wisconsin and voting across the nation. I am begging you, sir. I am begging you. Take it to him.”

Is anything missing in that account? Maybe, maybe not. On this, I am torn.

You see, as Milwaukeeans know, James T. Harris is black. (Or, as he prefers, he is an “American of African descent.”) But the article doesn’t mention that fact. Should it have?

On the one hand, I think that in most cases the race of people identified in news articles is irrelevant. One of the first steps we can take to de-emphaisizing race in America is to wean ourselves off of constant racial identification.

On the other hand, race is often relevant to the crux of the story. This is especially true when crime suspects are still at large, and a description is needed. That’s why they provide a racial description in police reports – so when a gangland-style murder occurs at 27th and North in Milwaukee, the cops aren’t wasting their time chasing down the Osmond family. (Although it could be argued that the Osmonds have murdered good taste for a good 30 years now.)

But in this case, it would seem that Harris’ race was relevant. Clearly, the article was written to give the impression that this was an angry mob of Republicans, who tend to be white and older. Did they leave Harris’ race out of the story because that may have conflicted with the story they were trying to tell? Were they afraid of portraying an African-American as angry and bitter? Or were they purposely witholding a description of Harris because they didn’t want to send a message than an African-American could actually oppose Barack Obama?

So in some instances, I think it’s admirable for newspapers to move to less racial identification of the people they identify. As more and more members of diverse races procreate together, tagging an ethnic classification based on sight is likely getting to be more of a challenge anyway. But in the case of James T. Harris, it seems as though there was a systematic decision to withold a fact that would have added more complexity and depth to the story. And I guess we’ll never know why.

Identifying James T.

I got back from being on the road for four days on Sunday, and began combing through the week\’s news to see what I had missed.  Naturally, the big story in Wisconsin was Milwaukee talk show host and blogger James T. Harris\’ admonition to John McCain to \”take it to\” Barack Obama – which made national news.

Now, I recognize that this story has pretty much run its course, as it is five days old now.  Stories in campaign season have the shelf life of mayonnaise in the sun – I might as well be writing about how the Bee Gees are bringing back the urban beard.  But there is one aspect of this story that remains interesting to me.

As I scanned the web, I noticed this account of Harris\’ confrontation with McCain as reported by the Washington Post:

\”It is absolutely vital that you take it to Obama, that you hit him where it hits, there\’s a soft spot,\” said James T. Harris, a local radio talk show host, who urged the Republican nominee to use Barack Obama\’s controversial former pastor, the Rev. Jeremiah A. Wright Jr., and others against him.

\”We have the good Reverend Wright. We have [the Rev. Michael L.] Pfleger. We have all of these shady characters that have surrounded him,\” Harris bellowed. \”We have corruption here in Wisconsin and voting across the nation. I am begging you, sir. I am begging you. Take it to him.\”

Is anything missing in that account?  Maybe, maybe not.  On this, I am torn.

You see, as Milwaukeeans know, James T. Harris is black.  (Or, as he prefers, he is an \”American of African descent.\”)  But the article doesn\’t mention that fact.  Should it have?

On the one hand, I think that in most cases the race of people identified in news articles is irrelevant.  One of the first steps we can take to de-emphaisizing race in America is to wean ourselves off of constant racial identification.

On the other hand, race is often relevant to the crux of the story.  This is especially true when crime suspects are still at large, and a description is needed.  That\’s why they provide a racial description in police reports – so when a gangland-style murder occurs at 27th and North in Milwaukee, the cops aren\’t wasting their time chasing down the Osmond family.  (Although it could be argued that the Osmonds have murdered good taste for a good 30 years now.)

But in this case, it would seem that Harris\’ race was relevant.  Clearly, the article was written to give the impression that this was an angry mob of Republicans, who tend to be white and older.  Did they leave Harris\’ race out of the story because that may have conflicted with the story they were trying to tell?  Were they afraid of portraying an African-American as angry and bitter?  Or were they purposely witholding a description of Harris because they didn\’t want to send a message than an African-American could actually oppose Barack Obama?

So in some instances, I think it\’s admirable for newspapers to move to less racial identification of the people they identify.  As more and more members of diverse races procreate together, tagging an ethnic classification based on sight is likely getting to be more of a challenge anyway.  But in the case of James T. Harris, it seems as though there was a systematic decision to withold a fact that would have added more complexity and depth to the story.  And I guess we\’ll never know why.

Feelin\’ Prosperous

I spent last weekend in Washington, D.C. at the \”Defending the American Dream\” summit, hosted by the national chapter of Americans for Prosperity. (I also went to the Wisconsin event in February, and wrote about it here.) As I routinely say, my American Dream consists of some combination of Megan Fox, chocolate chip cookies, and Packer games – preferably all at once. But I suppose their American Dream vision is worth defending, too.

The conference began on Friday, and the first big event was a rally in front of the U.S. Capitol to promote free markets. Strangely, it looked exactly like the scene from Forrest Gump where Forrest addresses the anti-Vietnam crowd and they pull the plug on his speech – just without the hippies, drugs, and reckless sex. (Wait – why did I go to this thing, again?)

Before the rally actually began, the crowd milled around for a good two hours in the hot sun. Hand made signs were issued that said things like \”No Commies in Congress\” and \”Drill Our Soil for More Oil.\” A stereo system played a mix of working-guy anthems (I believe the Fabulous Thunderbirds\’ \”Tough Enough\” was in the mix) and country favorites, none of which I had heard. The music only partially drowned out a female Vietnamese folk band that was playing directly behind us on the Capitol lawn, next to a giant wooden white cross. They appeared to have one two-hour song that likely turned listeners against whatever cause they were championing.

The day was odd, in that the stock markets were still crashing down – yet we were there at a rally defending the free market. Obviously, smart people recognize that much of the economic downturn was caused by government intervention in the market, not by big business avarice. Laws that incentivized lenders to give high-risk individuals loans (and in some cases penalized them when they didn\’t) certainly played a major part in the economic downturn of last week. But I am absolutely certain that the lay person watching their retirement fund disappear like a honey ham at a weight watchers clinic blames the whole debacle on a lack of government regulation.

The rally featured Americans for Prosperity president Tim Phillips, who hammered home the (I believe, correct) theory that government intervention caused the market crash. You can listen to Phillips\’ comments here:

[audio:http://www.wpri.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/multimedia/audio/afp.mp3]

After the rally, all the sweaty participants piled back into the buses and headed back to the hotel to get ready for the evening program, which included drinks, dinner, and speeches from list of conservative heavy hitters. The dinner was held in an immense conference room, which purportedly held 1,700 hungry free market enthusiasts. There was barely a seat to be had, but I found one against the wall in a corner, approximately 16 miles from the stage. The dinner was, well… it was conference chicken. And I mean no disrespect to Ed Meese or his family, but I did sneak out during his speech for an extra drink. Or two.

The highlight of my night came later, when George Will spoke to the conference attendees. (And yes, I recognize that saying that previous sentence out loud would prevent me from ever seeing a live naked woman again.) Will was a little more combative than he usually appears on TV, pacing maniacally around the stage.

A couple of weeks ago, I appeared on a Milwaukee Public TV show (4th Street Forum), where the panel members were supposed to discuss how terrible gridlock in the state legislature is, and how we can get more bills passed. I was the resident contrarian on the panel, arguing that gridlock and partisanship aren\’t really all that terrible. In fact, the only thing worse than a government that works too slow is a government that works too fast, as we get stuck with new laws with wide-ranging unintended consequences.

In any event, George Will closed his speech on Friday night with this exact point. He argued that gridlock isn\’t an American failing, it is an American achievement. For people like us that tend to believe government does more \”to\” us than \”for\” us, a \”do-nothing\” Congress isn\’t all that horrible of a thing. Anyway, it was just nice to have my ideas validated by someone who I\’ve considered since my teenage years to be the foremost conservative writer in the U.S.

The next day included another slate of big hitters, and some break out sessions dealing with health care, entitlements, blogging, and campus activism. Throughout the two days, I really enjoyed meeting the good folks who had traveled from all over the country to be there. I know it\’s often easy for the media to describe \”the right\” as some monolithic group of Bible thumpers bent on taking over the country, but in actuality, they\’re just regular folks tired of seeing their basic freedoms recede in the name of government greed.

Here\’s some coverage of the aforementioned rally on Capitol Hill:

You need to a flashplayer enabled browser to view this YouTube video

Feelin’ Prosperous

I spent last weekend in Washington, D.C. at the “Defending the American Dream” summit, hosted by the national chapter of Americans for Prosperity.  (I also went to the Wisconsin event in February, and wrote about it here.) As I routinely say, my American Dream consists of some combination of Megan Fox, chocolate chip cookies, and Packer games – preferably all at once.  But I suppose their American Dream vision is worth defending, too.

The conference began on Friday, and the first big event was a rally in front of the U.S. Capitol to promote free markets.  Strangely, it looked exactly like the scene from Forrest Gump where Forrest addresses the anti-Vietnam crowd and they pull the plug on his speech – just without the hippies, drugs, and reckless sex.  (Wait – why did I go to this thing, again?)

Before the rally actually began, the crowd milled around for a good two hours in the hot sun.  Hand made signs were issued that said things like “No Commies in Congress” and “Drill Our Soil for More Oil.”  A stereo system played a mix of working-guy anthems (I believe the Fabulous Thunderbirds’ “Tough Enough” was in the mix) and country favorites, none of which I had heard.  The music only partially drowned out a female Vietnamese folk band that was playing directly behind us on the Capitol lawn, next to a giant wooden white cross.  They appeared to have one two-hour song that likely turned listeners against whatever cause they were championing.

The day was odd, in that the stock markets were still crashing down – yet we were there at a rally defending the free market.  Obviously, smart people recognize that much of the economic downturn was caused by government intervention in the market, not by big business avarice.  Laws that incentivized lenders to give high-risk individuals loans (and in some cases penalized them when they didn’t) certainly played a major part in the economic downturn of last week.  But I am absolutely certain that the lay person watching their retirement fund disappear like a honey ham at a weight watchers clinic blames the whole debacle on a lack of government regulation.

The rally featured Americans for Prosperity president Tim Phillips, who hammered home the (I believe, correct) theory that government intervention caused the market crash.  You can listen to Phillips’ comments here:

[audio:http://www.wpri.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/multimedia/audio/afp.mp3]

After the rally, all the sweaty participants piled back into the buses and headed back to the hotel to get ready for the evening program, which included drinks, dinner, and speeches from list of conservative heavy hitters.  The dinner was held in an immense conference room, which purportedly held 1,700 hungry free market enthusiasts.  There was barely a seat to be had, but I found one against the wall in a corner, approximately 16 miles from the stage.  The dinner was, well… it was conference chicken.  And I mean no disrespect to Ed Meese or his family, but I did sneak out during his speech for an extra drink.  Or two.

The highlight of my night came later, when George Will spoke to the conference attendees.  (And yes, I recognize that saying that previous sentence out loud would prevent me from ever seeing a live naked woman again.)  Will was a little more combative than he usually appears on TV, pacing maniacally around the stage.

A couple of weeks ago, I appeared on a Milwaukee Public TV show (4th Street Forum), where the panel members were supposed to discuss how terrible gridlock in the state legislature is, and how we can get more bills passed.  I was the resident contrarian on the panel, arguing that gridlock and partisanship aren’t really all that terrible.  In fact, the only thing worse than a government that works too slow is a government that works too fast, as we get stuck with new laws with wide-ranging unintended consequences.

In any event, George Will closed his speech on Friday night with this exact point.  He argued that gridlock isn’t an American failing, it is an American achievement.  For people like us that tend to believe government does more “to” us than “for” us, a “do-nothing” Congress isn’t all that horrible of a thing.  Anyway, it was just nice to have my ideas validated by someone who I’ve considered since my teenage years to be the foremost conservative writer in the U.S.

The next day included another slate of big hitters, and some break out sessions dealing with health care, entitlements, blogging, and campus activism.  Throughout the two days, I really enjoyed meeting the good folks who had traveled from all over the country to be there.  I know it’s often easy for the media to describe “the right” as some monolithic group of Bible thumpers bent on taking over the country, but in actuality, they’re just regular folks tired of seeing their basic freedoms recede in the name of government greed.

Here’s some coverage of the aforementioned rally on Capitol Hill:

You need to a flashplayer enabled browser to view this YouTube video

This is Your World on Campaign Finance Reform

For years, we have been told by the media what a great thing campaign finance reform will be.  We’ll all be better informed when those dishonest, nasty attack ads are off the air, and local media has a monopoly on campaign speech.  Candidate messages to the voters can’t be trusted, but newspapers can.

Then, we see articles like this one from the Shepherd Express “newspaper” in Milwaukee.  It claims to be their “State Senate Update,” yet merely regurgitates every Senate Democratic Campaign Committee talking point fed to them.  I would be shocked if nearly every word of the article wasn’t written by the SDCC coordinator.  To wit:

Wasserman (Democrat) is cautiously favored for two reasons, even though this district has had a slight Republican bias. Wasserman, an obstetrician, is definitely outworking Darling (Republican). He has knocked on more than 23,000 doors over the past year and a half. In addition, many moderate Republicans, especially women, are disappointed with Darling, who went from being a moderate Republican when she was first elected in 1990 to a traditional conservative Republican.

Oh really?  Wasserman is “definitely outworking” Darling?  Is it mere coincidence that this “23,000 doors” number comes from Wasserman’s first campaign ad?  And where are these moderate Republican women disappointed with Darling?  This is merely a Democratic fantasy – the district isn’t “slightly” Republican, it is solidly so – George W. Bush, J.B. Van Hollen and Mark Green all received more than 56%.  (And yes, I realize this is essentially a GOP talking point, but I don’t purport to be a newspaper.)

Then there’s this gem, from the Sheila Harsdorf (Republican)/Allison Page (Democrat) race from the Northwest corner of the state:

But while her rural district is becoming more Democratic, Harsdorf has been moving to the right as a more party-line Republican. She has, for example, supported policies that would provide tax incentives for out-of-state trash companies to dump their garbage in Wisconsin landfills. At the same time, though, Harsdorf is a very likable and decent person.

Never mind that Harsdorf was the Senate author of a bipartisan bill that increased the tipping fee on business that dumped trash in Wisconsin – in response to Minnesota businesses bringing all their trash to our state.  (In the Northwest part of the state, you’d be better off defending child molesters than trash haulers.)  So why would the Shepherd Express in Milwaukee be so willing to peddle a demonstrably false accusation from a race all the way across the state?  Because they’ve essentially just become a newsletter for Senate Democrats.

Now, I could go through the entire article and point out how ridiculous its assertions are – anyone believing Wasserman is “favored,” or that Page has a “very good chance” for an upset, or that Republican Dan Kapanke’s seat in La Crosse is an “excellent chance for a Democratic pickup” would be laughed out of Madison by anyone knowing anything about those races.

The point is, this is why newspapers are so insistent on campaign finance reform, which would shut down campaign speech by candidates and their supporters.  By limiting spending and adversiting during political season, newspapers become more relevant, as they then carry the most influential public message about campaigns.  And in the Shepherd Express’ case, they can then print whatever ridiculous nonsense they are fed them by Senate Democrats without any competition.

In the early days of American democracy, much of the campaign messages were carried by partisan newspapers, which printed scandalous, unfounded rumors about candidates that they opposed.  By giving rags like the Shepherd Express a monopoly on political speech, we’d be heading right back to that type of partisan yellow journalism.

A Sincere Mea Culpa

A few days ago, I posted video of my screed against the Government Accountability Board, which aired on the \”Here and Now\” show on Wisconsin Public Television.  After the video, I relayed a conversation I had with a staff member, saying the staffer \”mocked\” my contention that there was voter fraud in Wisconsin.

In looking back at that post, I think I probably unfairly characterized that conversation by saying I was \”mocked.\”  When the staffer said it, it was clearly meant to be in good fun, and I returned the joke with a light-hearted, snide remark of my own.  But I recognize that the staff at the show are always fighting allegations of being biased towards the left, and my little anecdote probably didn\’t help things.

As I\’ve said before on this blog, the folks on Here and Now have been more than accomodating to me and my views on the show – not once have they ever told me I couldn\’t say anything or asked me to change my script.  They have been great – and the fact that they let a conservative like me go on the show and spout off shows that they interested in a fair representation of various viewpoints.

Thus, I will continue my segment, a la Peter Griffin\’s \”You Know What Really Grinds My Gears?\”

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McCain Challenges the American Public to Stay Awake

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After tonight\’s presidential debate, I had two choices: set fire to my eyelids, or write a post about the debate.  I had just pulled the matches out of the drawer, when a friend of mine messaged me and guilted me into writing something.  So here we go.

I thought the format was a little strange, and the candidates look way overcoached in these \”town hall\” debates.  You can see the wheels moving in their heads… turn this way… look at the questioner… walk over and pretend their question was smart… and so on.  Sadly, for McCain, he occasionally looked like he was getting lost – like he was an old guy at Sentry who couldn\’t find the tarragon.  At one point, I thought he was going to wander right off the stage, sit in the crowd, and enjoy the rest of the debate from the third row.

In fact, mark it down – in Saturday Night Live\’s opening sketch this week, that\’s going to be the joke – the candidates wandering around and getting uncomfortably close to the questioners.  They\’ll have McCain sit on someone\’s lap in the crowd or something, and have him walk right in front of the camera as Tom Brokaw is talking.  Of course, none of it will be funny.  I\’m still not necessarily sure what the point of these SNL sketches is – impersonations aren\’t funny unless there are jokes actually attached to the impressions.  But they know all the political blogs will be linking to them whenever the ridiculously overrated Tina Fey does her next Palin impersonation.  (The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel has written no fewer than four articles about Tina Fey\’s impersonations of Sarah Palin.  That\’s exactly four times as many as they\’ve written about the fact that MPS is going bankrupt in a couple years.)

I was pleased to learn from McCain that he will be purchasing my mortgage for me, in order to make sure I don\’t have to actually budget for my monthly payment in any way.  This is really getting absurd – it appears the goal of both candidates is to make America a giant sensory deprivation chamber.  Nobody\’s allowed to feel any emotion that could be considered good or bad.  The threshold of the pain we expect the government to ameliorate is directly proportional to the drop in the stock market – the more the Dow drops, the more we expect Congress to take the edge off.  And once the government offloads all my pain, if they can apply it to those fatcats that make lots of money (and pay all the taxes), even better.  Then again, if the government can save me from watching one more commercial for \”Frank TV\” during the baseball playoffs, that seems entirely appropriate.

Things got so bad during the debate that I actually gave McCain credit for saying health care was a \”responsibility\” and not a \”right.\”  I thought he was heading towards at least acknowledging that people should be encouraged to take more responsibility for their own health and the decisions they make for treatment.  Instead, he gave a mushy answer that at no point acknowledged that health care is largely a matter of taking care of ourselves, rather than asking government to do it for us.

It was at this point that I kind of zoned out.  Basically, debates are to help people who don\’t know much of anything to pretend they\’re politically engaged.  I\’m pretty sure the only reason people watch debates now is so they\’ll understand the opening SNL sketch.  But the whole discussion of health care actually managed to subtract from the public\’s knowledge base of issues.  We as a county now know less about health care as a result of their answers.  It\’s like anti-learning.

McCain did settle in and do a lot better during the questions about foreign policy, as should be expected.  And we all get that he loves General David Petraeus, and for good reason – but the General is getting to be too easy of a talking point.  At some point, Petraeus became the all-knowing master of world politics – like Willie Wonka in fatigues.  If I were Petraeus, just to screw with McCain, I\’d declare victory in Iraq to be contingent on Americans wearing their underwear on the outside of their pants.  Wouldn\’t that be embarrassing when McCain shows up for the final debate?

Well after the debate, Fox News posted the result of their \”poll\” showing 86% of their viewers think McCain won the debate.  Imagine that – 86% of Fox viewers who are allowed to call in or text their opinion think McCain won.  Why do they even waste our time with this nonsense?  It\’s just clear they have a deal with the cell phone companies to bait people into sending more text messages, for which they\’ll get charged.  Does anyone there care about being taken seriously?  Has a more meaningless statistic ever been run for two hours straight on a major network?

And I don\’t mean to be too tough on Fox – it just so happens I turn there after the debate because I can\’t watch MSNBC without wretching.  I flicked over to Chris Matthews for a brief moment, and he actually posited the theory that because McCain didn\’t mention William Ayers during the debate, that he was likely ashamed of Sarah Palin for hitting Obama so hard on it.  I\’m sure that was it.

(Incidentally, this is probably why I can never run for office – too many of my good friends are self-identified dirtbags.)

All in all, nobody really won the debate, but nobody did anything to embarrass themselves, either.  That\’s what\’s so entertaining about listening to the post-debate chatter from the talking heads: they all grade the debate as if there\’s no such thing as a half hour from now.  Ask Cubs fans what they think of predicting the future based on a few recent good performances.  All the heads think McCain\’s milquetoast performance dooms his campaign, until…the next debate, when their reaction will be equally as short-sighted.  I think the candidates know that debating well doesn\’t win you a campaign, but debating poorly can sure lose it, and prepare accordingly.  It\’s when either of them start swinging for the fences in their answers that can lead to a giant mistake that can euthanize their campaign.

Oh, and one last thing – was McCain\’s crack about hair replacement surgery a shot at Biden?

Prediction: In 30 years, candidates will still say they\’re for \”clean coal,\” and still, nobody in America will have any idea what they\’re talking about.

In the Media:

November 19, 2011: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – SAGE Program Isn\’t Paying Off

October 21, 2011: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – Illinois: The Way Not to Fix a Budget

April 23, 2011: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – See Past the Scare Tactics and Deception

March 12, 2011: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – New Budget a Change for the Better

February 16, 2011: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – State\’s Battle Lines: Are State Union Workers Beyond Belief?

January 16, 2010: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – MPS Needs a Mulligan

May 16, 2009: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – Employees\’ Share? Yet it\’s Borne by Taxpayers

March 14, 2009: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – Guess Who\’s Recession-Proof?

September 25, 2008: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – Government Retiree Benefits Could Hit Area Taxpayers Hard

August 2, 2008: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – Can the Brewers\’ Unusual Diversity Unite Milwaukee?

July 23, 2008: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel – Minimum Markup Law Adds 8 Cents to Gallon of Gas, Study Says

May 30, 2008: Wisconsin State Journal Editorial – Giving Credit Where It\’s Due

A Steaming Helping of High School Wisdom

Now, I readily concede that I\’m close to the upper age limit for Facebook. Anyone older than me, and it gets pretty creepy. But I have to say, Facebook is kind of freaking me out.

You see, more and more of my classmates are coming online and adding me as a Facebook friend. And in a lot of cases, I have no recollection of who these people are. When I do remember them, there\’s generally a reason I haven\’t spoken to them in 17 years. Although admittedly, in a lot of cases, it\’s neat to find out what some people are up to.

\"\"But it is strange – there\’s a reason I wanted to get out of high school so badly. I hated it with every molecule of my being. (Stuff white people like #83: Having Bad Memories of High School. #106: Facebook.) Now that I\’m being reunited with all these high school people, I\’m having flashbacks of all the stuff I abhorred. I was completely content to live the rest of my life not worrying about what certain people from high school thought about me. Now, all those problems are coming back, just fatter.

Anyway, when I see some people online, I admit I have to look them up in my yearbook. And as I was leafing through my senior class today, I was noticing all the horribly awkward senior quotes people had next to their pictures. Here\’s a sample – and I swear, these are all actual quotes meant to inspire my classmates:

\”The uncertainties of the present always give way to the enchanted possibilities of the future.\”

\”Today my world it smiles. Your hand in mine we walk the miles. Thanks to you it will be done. For you to me are the only one.\” – Led Zeppelin

\”I\’m on a mission from God\”

\”There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.\”

\”I am the Lorax. I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues.\”

\”I can accompish anything as long as I put my heart and mind into it.\”

\”Always give a hundred percent in the things you do, because everything you do depends on your future.\”

\”It\’s not what life gives you, it\’s how you use it. Don\’t hold back.\”

\”Let us die young or let us live forever.\” – DM

\”Peace and chicken grease, cuz homey don\’t play that!!!\”

\”An eye for an eye only leads to blindness.\”

\”I am a traveller of both time and space.\”

\”The pesimist (sic) only sees the red light, the optimist the green, the true wise are color blind.\”

\”Two paths diverged into the woods I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.\”

\”Left a smoking crater on my mind I\’d like to blow away, Heat came round and busted me for smiling on a cloudy day…\” Grateful Dead

\”He who lives in the future, pasts the past, but doesn\’t past the future, then has to futurely live in the present…\”

\”Don\’t be yourself if you\’re a nobody.\”

\”The paths of glory lead but to the grave.\”

\”Homework is simply mind over matter; if I don\’t mind, it doesn\’t matter.\” (ed. note – every yearbook in America contains this quote somewhere.)

\”I have my ship, and all her flags are flying. She is all that I have left, and music is her name.\” – Stephen Stills

\”Take your passion, and make it happen\” – Irene Cara

\”It takes both rain and sun to make a rainbow.\”

\”I SEE SAID THE BLIND MAN\”

\”We don\’t need to education, we don\’t need no thought control!\” – Roger Waters

\”Together we stand… Divided we fall.\” – Pink Floyd

\”I have two major weaknesses: tall black men and food, but not necessarily in that order.\”

\”Live alone and Free, like a tree, but in the Brotherhood of the Forest.\”

\”I see said the blind man.\” (ed. note – a popular one, apparently)

\”No hero in your tragedy, no daring in your escape, no salutes for your surrender, nothing noble in your fate. Christ, what have you done?\” – N.P.

You get the idea. And it goes on and on with quotes that you just know these guys thought were some totally deep stuff at the time. You always hear teenagers complaining about how adults don\’t take them seriously – and about how they deserve to be heard. But looking back, given our infinitesimal frame of reference, if teenagers ran things, there\’s no doubt the world would be a horrible, horrible place.

And mine?

\”You can only be young once, but you can be immature forever.\”

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(My apologies up front to the commenter who doesn\’t like pictures of me in my posts.)

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