Seeing as how this blog is now the repository (or suppository, depending on how you view it) of all the Legislature\’s crazy constituent letters, let\’s keep the mojo going. From January 23rd of this year:

Dear Wisconsin Legislators:

Wisconsin is the home of the greatest consumer fraud in the history of American marketing. The Wisconsin governors and legislators were partners in this horrible crime. Over a trillion dollars has been stolen from the American motoring public. False advertising and misrepresentation was the successful factor.

The chemical responsible, dicoco dimethyl ammonium chloride, was developed and manufactured in Janesville, Wisconsin. No chemical company was able to duplicate it. Our company worked with the chemists who invented it at Varney Chemical Company in the early 1960’s. Now owned by Degussa Chemical and very recently sold to Econik Company. Our company is very familiar with the history as we were directly involved.

The product is a drying agent that causes beading with kerosene. Butyl cellosolve, a deadly chemical is added for blending. One of many deadly chemicals sprayed on the public in car washes.

Our company refused to sell it as a wax although it became popular through a Wisconsin chemical company who called it spray wax. It sold for 50 cents and a wash sold for only 69 cents. It stormed the national industry without any warnings.

We entered the market with our Carnauba Wax called HOT WAX™. Shortly after we captured the market, Turtle Wax entered with a brush wax charging the public 4 times our product with their kerosene product. The brush failed to work so Turtle Wax continued its high price kerosene calling it polish wax.

The public bought it in large numbers through false advertising because of the Turtle Wax name. They dominated the paste wax market for many years. The key ingredient in the paste wax was Carnauba Wax.

Carnauba Wax is dielectric, which means it prevents rusting. Today Turtle Wax makes the most money selling kerosene. A judge ruled they must add, “does not contain Carnauba Wax” to their advertisings.

A federal judge, in our company’s case, against Turtle Wax embarrassed our company’s lawyers by screaming that they threw spaghetti on his wall. Because of this remark no lawyer would take any of our cases against car wash criminals. The judge put us out of business.

Criminals had no fear of cheating the public. They have gone wild stealing over a trillion dollars from the public in car washes. Many businesses are now using the car wash as promotion for a large number of consumer frauds. Huge companies and large marketers have entered the market.

If we had an honest government this would not have happened. Please challenge any of my statements. Wisconsin Administrators and Legislators owe the American people the trillions of dollars stolen from them because they supported and promoted this huge crime.

There are volumes of data available for your review to substantiate our statements
Crime always continues when governments profit. If you do not act now – this crime will never stop. You owe it to the children and families who are sprayed with these deadly chemicals.

As a citizen of Wisconsin we herby demand that you immediately act to protect the public and stop acting in favor of the criminals.

Truly yours,

Name Withheld