Christian Schneider

Author, Columnist

Major Breaking Bratwurst News

The Capital Times today has a shocking exclusive:

\”Brat Fest Hailed as \’Best We\’ve Ever Had\’\”

Oh really? Amazing that Tim Metcalfe wouldn\’t say \”actually, it was complete disgrace this year, one of our worst years ever.\” In reality, they only sold 157,000 brats, over 30,000 less than their high of 2004. A lot of that has to do with the hassle of now having to drive all the way to the Dane County Expo Center, and a lot probably has to do with the cost of the brats being increased $1.50.

Amazing that people will complain bitterly about oil companies when the price of gas goes up a nickel, but Johnsonville jacks the cost of their brats up 50%, and everyone\’s okay with it? I\’m being gouged by so much \”big sausage,\” I feel like Paris Hilton.

(Thank you, thank you… that was really the whole reason to do this post.)

Also, there\’s this:

To pump up sales next year, Metcalfe said he\’s seriously considering selling a double brat on a hard roll, a traditional style of eating for die-hard brat lovers.

First of all, this is cheating, trying to artificially pump up the numbers of brats sold. They already include sales of the execrable boca soy brats in the total, which is an abomination. Secondly, sales of a \”double brat\” will kill 20 Madisonians. And I am not kidding.

1 Comment

  1. Mr. Pelican Pants

    May 29, 2007 at 9:20 pm

    My old man works the grill at this thing, and has since its inception at the Hilldale parking lot. So he’s old school. He says this thing has become very “corporate” and a bit of a headache.

    Anytime it takes 45 minutes to drive from the Coliseum entrance to Rimrock Road (essentially the length of the parking lot) you know they got problems.

    I think next year I’ll just head over to the Willy Street Co-Op “vegan bratfest” and join the seven other people who enjoyed that event.

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