Christian Schneider

Author, Columnist

Saving Me From Myself

So for Christmas last year, I got my wife a year long \”wine of the month\” membership at Barriques. It\’s actually great – they do a really good job picking out wines, although the downside is that you have to go to the store and pick them up once a month.

I was working late tonight, and remembered that I needed to pick up the wine before I came home. I went straight from work to Barriques, and it looked like they were closing. I went in and asked if I could just pick up my wine, even though the register was closed. The girl there said that was fine, then corrected herself.

\”It\’s after 9:00 – I can\’t let you walk out of here with it.\”

I looked at my watch and noticed it was 9:03. And I couldn\’t leave with a bottle of wine I purchased in December of 2006.

So thank you, state law, for saving me from the convenience of picking up my wine. We are all much safer now that I have to make an extra trip out to Barriques to get it. Lord knows the damage I could do with that corked bottle in the back seat of my car on the way home.


  1. But if you would have drank that bottle on-site, you could have waited until 1:59 am the next morning (or started drinking at 6 am instead of 8 am).

    Fragging’ bass-ackward.

  2. Send your Thank-You notes to Carol Roessler, Mother of All Wisconsinites, c/o State Capitol, Madistan, WI.

    Carol’s Motherhood Knows No Bounds.

    (That’s the title of her personal hymn.)

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